She is the sweetest smiley girl and I just love her so.
Let’s start with the night before.
It was a Saturday and my husband and I had received gift cards to Texas Roadhouse. We decided to have a little date night since baby could “come any day now.” I remember ordering a medium well steak that night thinking, “hope baby doesn’t come tomorrow ‘cause I wouldn’t want this to be the meal I’d have right before I go into labor” — if you know, you know. Ah! It was a great night and I loved every bit of it. However, when we went home, I had to ask Jeff to massage me because I felt just extreme aches in my lower back and all around the sides of my belly. My initial thought was that my body was just prepping for labor … or so I thought.
…then comes morning.
8:45 AM | I woke up at 8:45am to get ready for church because 3rd trimester had my pregnant self moving incredibly slow - I needed a little more time to get ready. As soon as I got up, I felt an immediate gush of liquid and that only meant one thing. My water had broken. So my initial thought was to slowly get ready and pack my hospital bag because of course I hadn’t packed it yet. I was going to have Jeff and Noah just attend church while I got myself ready, but I called the hospital and they advised me to just head in to get checked. I knew that, but I knew it’d take some time, so I didn’t want to rush in to just sit around.
It feels like a million times that I've tried to start this post only to be called upon for the next feeding, or my mind was drawn elsewhere, or I just couldn't find the words. Honestly, I started this post back in January, so it feels like a long time that it's been sitting here … however Caleigh is finally asleep and I somehow found it in me to grab my laptop from the living room, so let's try it again and see how long I get 'til she wakes up again.
Rewind back to January when I first started this post …
I can't believe the holidays have come and gone. I know for some, it didn't quite feel like Christmas. That's the same for me, too, but I was reminded that Christmas isn't about feeling a certain way. It's a celebration of Emmanuel, God with us. Needless to say, that was comforting for me as I spent the holidays at home with baby as I'm fresh into this postpartum period. Lol. Anyway, here's some updates on what we've been up to these past couple of months.
And now back to the present.
ADJUSTMENT // no surprise there, still learning to adjust and convinced I will forever be learning how to do so. In some sense, it feels surreal that we've spent the last six months here. Time has been both slow and fast, moving so quickly, yet sometimes I feel like my life's been put on pause. In all honesty, there have been some hard moments and it could be due to a plethora of reasons, but in other ways, it's been a complete blessing in disguise and that's something to be thankful for.
WINTER // we had another snow storm last week and it made me way too sad. When I was young, a boy from youth asked me, "Why do we let the weather control the way feel?" Good question. I don't know why either, but it really does have some effect on the way we feel sometimes. Admittedly, the lingering snow has me feeling pretty blue these days. Except just this morning, I woke up at 6:30am to wake Jeffrey up for work only to find that the sun already made its way out! That was sadly exciting. Haha!
HEALTH & POSTPARTUM // I was cleared at my 6-week appointment! I started a new workout program that felt fitting for this season I'm in - postpartum, newborn life, one car, limited time = workouts at home. Haha. Honestly, I'm not far in, but one day at a time is what I'm telling myself.
CALEIGH JUNE // delivered at 37 weeks and we are so in love! Still surreal that we have a baby girl and are now a family of four! When we brought her home, I felt so busied with multiple little tasks that I didn't have time to process everything, but the moment I finally got to catch a breath, I cried. Lol. I think it was a mixture of good tears and sad ones, too… just grieving the idea of it no longer being just us and Noah. It's a feeling I can't quite put into words. We're 2 months in with Caleigh now and I can't imagine what life was even like without her. Birth story to come later!
OTHER RANDOM THINGS I'VE BEEN INTO //
+ SHOWS: Emily in Paris, Crash Landing on You, The Last of Us
+ BOOKS: It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover and Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid
+ DRINKS: Better Greens has been so good. I've been enjoying it so much.
+ OUR NIGHT ROUTINE: consists of nothing much, but I've been enjoying the winding down part of our day.
+ BIBLE: working through Romans and its gospel truths continue to encourage my soul
+ PLANNERS: still loving my planner line up + journals. It's been a surprising form of stress relief for me.
Starting this off with the fact that I maybe have half an hour before Noah wakes from his nap. Life seems to be that way lately … doing things in the pockets of time that I have. Sometimes it feels like I never have any time and then other days, it's the opposite. I'll take it all as they come. It's been a joy nonetheless and very much a season of learning as I'm sure it'll continue to be regardless of where I am. When Noah grows, I feel like I'm learning to grow also, but at his pace and for his season of life.
So that's how motherhood has been. It's not been an easy embrace, but I'm glad the Lord has softened my heart, as a mom, to see my role as a truly meaningful one in whatever the day holds - like to have incredibly slow mornings because Noah needs my full attention or not getting anything done and not feeling productive, but knowing that nothing is hidden from His sight, so I shouldn't be concerned about the things I am concerned about. My nature wants to go against everything I "have" to do as a mom, but I know I'm only where I'm at because of God's grace in my life. And also, I have a really good partner in Jeff so there's that, too. ;)
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| our go-to breakfast lately. a bagel and coffee. |
Some recent favorites:
+ Ningxia red. Still enjoying this drink especially during pregnancy. Nice, cold drinks are a go-to!
+ Dark roast coffee! I love that it's getting colder out now so I can enjoy hot coffee again.
+ My SUNDAYS playlist on Spotify.
+ a good makeup routine. Been loving this foundation.
Hi! I'm back from a long hiatus, yet again. What's happened since February?
Noah's a little older. We celebrated his first birthday which brought tears to my eyes as I thought about how he'll always be growing and this sweet little boy that I get the privilege of raising will not always be this small. However, I love seeing him learn and flourish.
Currently, he's down to just taking one nap a day. He loves anything outdoors. Noah will sport his red crocs without hesitation and he actually walks so well in them. I love his chubby feet squished in there. He's currently only speaking gibberish, but knows exactly what to do when we ask him to do it. It's mind-blowing, actually, to see him learning these things. Just fascinating. To be honest, as he is learning, so am I. It's truly the most humbling task that I'll ever get to do and I'm just thankful that the Lord has allowed me to be a mom to him.
Travel. We honestly haven't done much traveling this year, but we did just come back from annual conference and that was refreshing to see friends again.
Marriage. Jeff and I celebrated 5 years of marriage this past month. The years have gone by so so fast and I almost forgot again! Life's been fun, though and I always say the same thing … it only gets sweeter with each passing year. I often think about our first years of marriage and remember how silly and naive we were — in a sense, we will probably always will be naive, but I've loved the journey.
Transition. I haven't officially announced it but we've been telling people here and there - Jeff and I are expecting again! It's very exciting, but I feel like the busyness of summer has kept me occupied in other ways. As our family grows, naturally I'm thinking about our future and I can't help but continue to desire a space of our own. While so thankful for the space we have currently, I can't wait for our family to have our own space to serve one another, to eat together, to function as our own. I'll continue to wait on the Lord for His timing. Not to mention, the market is crazy. Ha! That's kind of where I'm at though.
Other than that, I've been taking this pregnancy one day at a time. I was surprised with the onset of major nausea in the first trimester. It hit me like a ton of bricks and it was bad. Very thankful to be in the 2nd trimester with a little more energy! Yesterday, I had a dream that it was a girl and I've been crossing my fingers to have a little girl, but we'll see when the day comes. ;)
That's all for now, folks.
Hello friends! I've been a little quiet on this side of the internet, but mostly due to the fact that life has been just plain full. As Noah continues to grow up, I'm walking alongside him and just wanting to be as present as I can. I ain't gonna lie though, there are some days I struggle in embracing this stay-at-home life but let it be known that I'm thankful I get to be home with my little family. We are coming up on Noah's first birthday and it gets me all emotional thinking about how fast he's growing. Everyone's quick to tell you to hold 'em tight for they only get bigger… and it's all very true. As much as I felt "present," it all seems like a blur. :(
I started a bible reading plan with goals to read the entire bible in a year. I'm not ashamed to say that I've never read it in its entirety, but I am SO pumped to be doing this. In the short span of 2 months, I've seen the fruit of being in God's word daily and the Lord is doing a work in my heart for sure. For spiritual disciplines, I've committed to memorizing scripture. As Noah grows up, I'm finding that I have less and less time to just sit for my quiet times with the Lord and memorizing scripture has been such an immense help in enabling me to meditate on His word. It is a true renewal of the mind (Romans 12:1-2).
Running & health: consistencies and set backs. I've had my share of both. Of course we're only 2 months into the year, but my fleshly tendencies are screaming that it's too soon to be experiencing set backs. However, when I find myself in God's word, it reminds me of the soon to come redemption of our earthly bodies. The pain, aches, our body image … it'll all be meaningless when in the presence of our Father.
Sourdough trial #2 is in the works. I'm late to the sourdough game, but here we are again! I shared on insta that I had started my first sourdough starter. It didn't go as planned, but as I think about it now, it's probably because our kitchen temp was too cold. I'm retrying and y'all….I ain't never been this excited about bread! Will keep you updated.
Currently on repeat: All Too Well | Taylor Swift, All The Way My Saviour Leads Me, Here is Love Vast As The Ocean, The Joker and The Queen | Ed Sheeran, Thank You Jesus for the Blood | Charity Gayle
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